Feb 23, 2026 at 1:40 PM @Spatula Update us, spatch Are you surviving solo for now or are you quiet because you’re back with her and can’t bear to show your face?
Feb 23, 2026 at 1:59 PM @Spatula can’t come to the phone right now, his hands and feet are tied to his bed and he’s staring into the wrong end of a 10” strapon
Feb 23, 2026 at 3:19 PM Things were going ok, I was dealing with it, but today she showed up in my house. I didnt have the heart to kick her out. She was sweet and nice. We talked. No conclusion, but I would be lying if I said I hated seeing her. She still insists she cleaned up her act and would never repeat the same mistakes. I told her she seems to have borderline personality disorder. She said she has aspects of it, but not entirely and will work on herself forever. I dont know. I am tempted. We even made out a little because I couldnt resist her. But still... i dont know. Im seeing a therapist. s----s f-----.
Feb 23, 2026 at 3:28 PM Good to hear you've been maintaining and talking about everything with a pro! That's a great instinct. Go, you! As for today... keep in mind you've set a boundary she refuses to respect. So. There is that.
Feb 23, 2026 at 5:15 PM And the boundary was for her own good. Its not like my boundary was something from a whim of mine. But she swears she understands it now. That shes glad it happened for that, to give her a wakeup call. I believe she believes it.
Feb 23, 2026 at 5:49 PM It’ll be better when you find a new girlfriend. In the meantime it’s okay to be single and figure yourself out more.
Feb 26, 2026 at 10:26 AM She showed up again the day after. Talked a lot some more. I told her as is: I dont know what I want, I'm scared to try again, all my friends are against her ans cant stand to see me ruin my life with her, if we were to get back together we would have to be isolated from everyone because nobody likes her, and then I risk her having another meltdown and regretting I ever came back. She still insists she is a different woman now. I cannot buy it. People dont change. I think what is going to happen is I will tell her she can no longer pop in to see me, no contact, we need to go our separate ways, hope she works on herself and becomes the best version of her. But not with me. But even now as I typed it all, I dont know if thats my true opinion or I'm channeling my friends. But she has a thousand red flags even without the alcohol. She means well but she just falls short.
Feb 26, 2026 at 12:37 PM Nothing about this is easy. You sound so invested in her but also torn. What a nightmare. You don't have to KNOW what's right, and you don't have to have the final answer now... I think your instincts are good and I think defending your boundaries is important. I think you will not regret trusting that gut feeling. If you want to revisit in 3 months, you could leave that sort of option on the table... might be easier than thinking you're amputating a limb TODAY, NOW. Especially if you're not certain exactly what that gut feeling is. There's no perfect way to do it. You're doing fine.
