Nov 16, 2025 at 5:36 PM

Who else has been through it / going through it? I spent 8 years (1 year of marriage) with my ex-wife. It’s an absolutely wrenching feeling so far, about a month into this reality.

 

Nov 16, 2025 at 7:02 PM

Has she been with someone else yet? That thought alone should keep you from ever feeling down about her or wanting to go back to her, no matter how long you were with her.


If you have no children with her, it should be a lot easier, if you have children it makes it 10x harder imo. Be very thankful if it’s the former.


Theres plenty of better, funnier, hotter women out there than her, get yourself out there and have some fun. The weakest thing a man can do imo is sit wallowing and overthinking about a female.


It’s high likely you will slowly start to become a better person throughout all this eventually too. More hard working, smarter, healthier, everything. It just takes a little time. Trust the process

 

Nov 16, 2025 at 7:02 PM

You don't have to answer but do you have children with her?

 

Nov 16, 2025 at 11:08 PM

I'm not saying its a red flag but that's a long time to be with someone without being committed and maybe is why the marriage didn't last long. I dunno just from what I've seen with other people.

 

Nov 17, 2025 at 7:59 AM

I caught her texting a co-worker in a very flirtatious manner which went on for like 6 months prior. She insisted nothing physical ever happened.

also no children with her luckily enough, that does minimize the hassle for sure.

 

Nov 17, 2025 at 8:00 AM

We did live together since 2020 and have dated since 2019.

 

Nov 17, 2025 at 11:43 AM

Your getting a divorce cuz she flirted? Did y’all talk about boundaries or was she intentionally cheating.

 

Nov 17, 2025 at 6:06 PM

It was a slow burn. So I told her I totally forgave the flirting and stuff cuz that’s whatever in the long run. But she told me she let herself start flirting and doing that cuz she had been unhappy for like 2 years.

 

Nov 17, 2025 at 6:09 PM

Also I should make it clear, she insisted on this divorce, literally one moment we were hanging out and then the next our entire marriage was done.

 

Nov 17, 2025 at 6:40 PM

Oh that’s rough buddy

 

Nov 19, 2025 at 4:38 PM

Dang. That's rough man. I've been with my wife for nearly 20 years now (married for 14 years). We have two kids together.

I couldn't imagine life without her at this point. But I'm lucky, she lets me do my own thing whenever I want. Within reason of course. I've always been faithful (bar a little flirting but I'd like to think that's normal).

Couldn't imagine going through what you're going through man. I hope everything works out.

 

Nov 19, 2025 at 5:53 PM

Sorry to hear that man!

Not the same but I was dating a girl for a year and a bit then she got baptized and became a religious fanatic and basically dumped me for jesus. Meanwhile we never had any issue ever and everything was always super easy and fun and had made so many plans and commitments to each other. She'd told me so many times about how id changed her life and was the best thing that ever happened to her, then I was just cut, was weird as f---.

She'd always been religious but she started at a new church and it became absolutely insanity.

Been about 2 months now and I still think about her a bit but at the same time im just like whatever f--- it. It'll get better for you for sure.

Get out there and get laid or something, once I did that I got a new hot af fwb and its definitely been a good distraction. It doesn't fully make you feel better because of all the memories you have together but itll help you as you better yourself and move on.

 

Nov 19, 2025 at 10:32 PM

I’m so sorry you’re going through this. Divorce is rough. Been there done that, hopefully you don’t have a property and intwined financials. That got ugly in my situation. Do you your best to keep your head up. Keep busy.
But honestly, from a female perspective if we love somebody trust we don’t flirt. Text flirting, there’s a good chance there’s more to it, run while you can. Being out with the girls clubbing type flirting usually pretty innocent doesn’t go further than that if we love our man